I will be contacting Don Fnordlioni, the creator of this deck, to see if he would like to create an alternate version of this deck.
Brian Strassman - 12/13/95
by Tod Beardsley, key re-write suggestions by Aaron Curtis The title of the deck combines Bjorne's quote and a line from The Crow -- this deck maximizes the fruits of destroying Bjorne in a sneaky, evil way, boosting his power as fast as possible then killing him before anyone catches on. IMHO, it's much better than the method of raising his power in the WDH (He's Big, Pink, and Rules the World). If all goes well, you end up in a good position for the win -- but even if you don't win, the look on the faces of your opponents is definitely worth the trouble.
Absolutely critical cards are marked with (*) following the card name. This was built out of only the cards I own (which is about 60% of the set). If I owned the Factory Set, I'm sure I could do a little more with this deck.
You can replace basically all the non-starred cards, and the Evil Trick will still work fine -- specifically, this could use more plot- cancelling cards (such as Hoax and Secrets), and maybe a couple more juicy disasters and assassinations.
BEGINNING THE GAME If your opposition looks like it'll be remarkably strong, and able to move quickly towards their goals, lead with Clone Arrangers for the sheer power, and the bonus to pick up Bjorne if you must attack him. Otherwise, lead with the more relaxed Rosicrucians. Both are *Secret*, so you don't have to worry too much about them getting attacked. For your first automatic takeover (ATO), I'd suggest the Lawyers for their defensive bonuses. Keep a close eye on the other player's winning conditions -- if they're moving too fast, you may have to scrap The Trick, and shoot for the Criminal Overlords Goal. THE MIDGAME Pretty simple, if things are going well. ATO the Moonbase, and keep using the Rosicrucian's action to select the critical plots: Pulitzer Prize, Martyrs, and Privileged Attack. Hopefully, you'll have all three of these by Turn 3, definitely by turn 4. Once these cards are in your hand, ATO Bjorne, if you can. (If you're feeling risky, you can attack Bjorne, with the Clone's +4, but I wouldn't gamble against that 11 or 12). Now you're in position for The Trick: * * * * * * * * * * BANG! * * * * * * * * * * Link Bjorne to the Moonbase. Play Pulitzer Prize on him, following up with Martyrs. Narrow your eyes, look evil, and attack the Moonbase with Bjorne, using the Rosicrucian's action to aid with the Privileged Attack (you have a 22 to destroy). Now, pick up most, if not all, of your Plot Deck, and put it in your hand! Bjorne's killed himself by rampaging around the Moonbase, and his power at the time was 21, so that means 24 Plot cards total (1 for killing Bjorne, 1 for being Cthulhu and killing him, 21 for his power, and 1 for destroying Moonbase and being Cthulhu)! You may have had to Secrets someone's Hoax, or somesuch, but now you'll probably have /all/ your disasters, your Goal, your other +10 boosters, everything in your hand. All this, and you keep all your action tokens, save the Rosicrucians! (May as well Annual Convention them, too, cause they're not going to do you much good anymore.) THE ENDGAME Depending on how things went up until this point, you have two options (feel free to let the other players know you'll be taking a while -- 25 some odd plots in your tentacles tend to take up some time): Option 1 (The Fun Way): Use your Disasters and power boosters to start destroying groups left and right in a thrashing frenzy. Maximize this killing spree with the remaining Privileged attack, and Fear and Loathing. Option 2 (The More Subtle Way): Use your Terrorist Nukes, Swiss Bank Account, Fear & Loathing, Blitzkrieg, and Privilege to take the rest of the groups out of your hand. If you're short a Violent-Criminal, you can always turn Lawyers or I.R.S. Violent by having the Saturday Morning Cartoons control them. SPECIFIC USES FOR THE OTHER CARDS: Double Cross: Protect your plans, or protect your massively huge hand. Extra Privilege: In case the first one gets Hoaxed. Annual Convention: On the off chance there's a low power group hanging off the end of some tree. Sat. Morning Cartoons + Let's Get Organized: Turn Lawyers and I.R.S. Violent, as well as Criminal. Energy Crisis: For use against Gnomes or Network, softening them up for the kill. Substitute a Don't Forget to Smash the State if you know someone's going to be Gov't crazy, and don't mind stripping your own I.R.S.'s power. It's Yellow, you you can have this and Fear & Loathing out at the same time. The Second Bullet: Conservation of action tokens in the endgame: Don't commit unless you have to! Agent in Place: Make sure nobody's holding a Hoax or die- rerolling Plot. Mob Connections, New Blood, Necronomicon, Cyborg Soldiers: In case you have to scrap killing Bjorne, your few groups will be powerful enough to grab other Violent/Criminals, or destroy pretty much anyone, esp. Shangri-La, Discordians, and Bermuda Triangle. DECK MODIFICATIONS: Feel free. I'm positive this deck can be fine-tuned for whichever Endgame option you'd like: More disasters, assassinations, power boosters and especially Hoaxes and Secrets. The specific plots are completely up to you, limited (like me) by what cards you have available. For the minimum killing Bjorne trick, Bjorne, Moonbase, Rosicrucions, Pulitzer Prize, and Martyrs are all Common; only Privileged Attack is Uncommon. You may want to include a Nobel Peace Prize, if you're feeling really greedy, and get 5 more plot cards. Heck, you can even substitute out Cthulhu if you're feeling especially odd -- you just will miss out on some superfuluos destruction power and 2 extra plot cards, but couple NWO: Don't Forget...State with Goal: Up Against the Wall, and you're in a good position with any Illuminati. Thanks to Aaron Curtis (original Deck of the Week guy) for helping out with this fixed version (V 1.2 for those keeping score), and Brian Strassman for noticing the illegal manuver in v 1.0).