Here are some rules that are not only funny but may also be useful.
Assume nothing.
Don't force it; get a larger hammer.
Be braver--you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
Don't be humble--you are not that great. (Golda Meir)
It takes twenty years of hard work to become an overnight success. (Diana Rankin)
No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.
Laughter is the closest distance between two people. (Victor Borge)
Never underestimate the power of a small tactical nuclear weapon.
Life in uncertain. Eat dessert first. (Ernestine Ulmer)
About the only difference between stumbling blocks and stepping stones is the way that you use them.
Beware the advice of successful people; they do not seek company. (Scott Adams)
Quality is not an act; it is a habit. (Aristotle)
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important. (Bertrand Russell)
Any one may so arrange his affairs that his taxes shall be as low as possible; he is not bound to choose that pattern which will best pay the Treasury; there is not even a patriotic duty to increase one's taxes. (Judge Learned Hand, 1947)
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