| 211 |  |
The figures are still a long way off, when suddenly-- |
| 212 |  |
BOY: Who are
they? HEAD UR. (Steve): (with a thick German accent) Hello, little boy. UR. #1 (Shawn): (Southern) Howdy, son. UR. #2 (Dirk): (Japanese) Ah, so! UR. #3 (Steve): (French) Q’est-ce se, oui oui! UR. #4 (Shawn): (Cockney) Starved-lookin’ rugrat, ain’t ya? Drained your bladder lately?" BOY: Drained my—who are you? |
| 213 |  |
SFX: An
angelic note HEAD UR.: A gift for you, my boy. These spectacles will cleanse your doors of perception. With them, you will become an initiate! BOY: Gesundheit. But who are you? |
| 214 |  |
HEAD UR.: We
are a roving band of urologists. We wander the golf courses of the world in search of ze
people who need our specialized services. UR. #4: We’re a team! UR. #3: Une brotherhood! UR. #1: We’re a little bit country— UR. #2: --and a rittle bit lock ’n’ loll! |
| 215 |  |
HEAD UR.: Und
with ze proper training, you can become one of us! BOY: But what do you do? HEAD UR.: We are experts in ze art of urology. BOY: But what’s that? HEAD UR.: We are skilled in the science of the urinary tract. BOY: But what’s that? HEAD UR.: We help people pee. |
| 216 |  |
VOICE #1 (from Green Eggs and Hamlet): To pee or not to pee; that is the question whether-- |
| 217 |  |
HEAD UR.: Perhaps
ziz will explain—okay boys, we sing our song now. MUSIC: Sung directly over a copy of Under the Sea from The Little Mermaid, with no attempt to hide the other vocal track other than by singing more loudly. (The original script reads "Urology—the song that will mark the beginning of Mizpah’s bout with legal departments across the world.") HEAD UR.: (spoken) Young boy, listen to me. The human world--it's a mess! Urology is better than any science they got out there... |
| 218 |  |
HEAD UR.: (sung) The golf course is always greener On somebody else's green. We'll show you the best life out there We're part of the golden stream. Just look at the world around you-- Not one single open door We're here as the one exception-- The friends you've been looking for! Urology,
urology-- |
| 219 220 |
 |
UROLOGISTS: (two-part
harmony) Scatologists love to putter In everyone's doggie do. But if you're not very careful The next dog just might be you! A UROLOGIST: (sung)
Orthopedists aren't much better-- |